Monday, January 4, 2010

Old life meet new life

So I'm going to start blogging again. It's been way more than a year since I deleted my old one but now I find I have things I need to say. Things that I don't want to unload on anyone. So here it comes.

In August 08 my doctor suggested I should try to taper off my medication. I've been taking Zoloft for several years to treat depression and mild anxiety. I very slowly started going down in dosage. 6 months later is was down to 50 mg a day from 200, but I was a wreck. It was the worst Christmas ever. I was crying, sleeping, avoiding everything and everyone. I couldn't eat, I lost 10 pounds in about 2 weeks. I knew I wasn't doing well so decided to go back up in dosage until I felt normal again. Slowly I went back to 150 mg a day, where I have been since February 09.

Getting back into a depression wasn't all bad I guess. It helped me see that I wasn't happy. I always thought I was. I always thought I loved my husband and our life. Turns out I didn't.

In May 09, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. It hit him out of nowhere. He had no idea it was coming. He begged me to go to counselling and try to make things work. I didn't want any part of it. I was done.


4 comments:

  1. Hello dear friend!!! I have so missed you. It was the funniest thing. I was checking out my sitemeter when your town showed up and I just had to do pop over and see if it really was you *grin*. I was terribly worried about you last spring when you mysteriously disappeared and no one seemed to know what had happened. Wow, what a year you have had, I'm sorry to hear of your divorce. Wish I could give you a big (((HUG))). Hope to see more of you in the bloggy world and to keep in touch again.

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  2. Thank you for the update. I've missed you. Sorry you've had a rough 2009. Hope 2010 is better for you.

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  3. Oh! I'm so glad you came back! I've missed you! praying for you and hoping things are going well!
    :hugs:
    Manda

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  4. SO glad you are back out there... make my little heart go pitty pat! :)

    maddie

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