Monday, January 4, 2010

Old life meet new life

So I'm going to start blogging again. It's been way more than a year since I deleted my old one but now I find I have things I need to say. Things that I don't want to unload on anyone. So here it comes.

In August 08 my doctor suggested I should try to taper off my medication. I've been taking Zoloft for several years to treat depression and mild anxiety. I very slowly started going down in dosage. 6 months later is was down to 50 mg a day from 200, but I was a wreck. It was the worst Christmas ever. I was crying, sleeping, avoiding everything and everyone. I couldn't eat, I lost 10 pounds in about 2 weeks. I knew I wasn't doing well so decided to go back up in dosage until I felt normal again. Slowly I went back to 150 mg a day, where I have been since February 09.

Getting back into a depression wasn't all bad I guess. It helped me see that I wasn't happy. I always thought I was. I always thought I loved my husband and our life. Turns out I didn't.

In May 09, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. It hit him out of nowhere. He had no idea it was coming. He begged me to go to counselling and try to make things work. I didn't want any part of it. I was done.


  1. Hello dear friend!!! I have so missed you. It was the funniest thing. I was checking out my sitemeter when your town showed up and I just had to do pop over and see if it really was you *grin*. I was terribly worried about you last spring when you mysteriously disappeared and no one seemed to know what had happened. Wow, what a year you have had, I'm sorry to hear of your divorce. Wish I could give you a big (((HUG))). Hope to see more of you in the bloggy world and to keep in touch again.

  2. Thank you for the update. I've missed you. Sorry you've had a rough 2009. Hope 2010 is better for you.

  3. Oh! I'm so glad you came back! I've missed you! praying for you and hoping things are going well!

  4. SO glad you are back out there... make my little heart go pitty pat! :)